Your coachman might Parnassus climb,
Your butler be a poet.
Then, oh, how charming it would be
If, when in haste hysteric
You called the page, you learned that he
Was grappling with a lyric.
Or else what rapture it would yield,
When cook sent up the salad,
To find within its depths concealed
A touching little ballad.
Or if for tea and toast you yearned,
What joy to find upon it
The chambermaid had coyly laid
A palpitating sonnet.
Your baker could the fashion set;
Your butcher might respond well;
With every tart a triolet,
With every chop a rondel.
Your tailor’s bill . . . well, I’ll be blowed!
Dear chap! I never knowed him . . .
He’s gone and written me an ode,
Instead of what I owed him.
So easy ’tis to rhyme . . . yet stay!
Oh, terrible misgiving!
Please do not give the game away . . .
I’ve got to make my living.