Running for Senator with clumsy pace,

From the fair tropics-paid a Christian priceAnd was content in my fool’s paradise,Where never had been heard the word ‘Protection.’‘T was my sole island; there I dwelt aloneNo customs-house, collector nor collection,But a man came, who, in a pious toneCondoled with me that I had never knownThe manifest advantage of Protection.So, when the trading-boat arrived…

To execute great feats of tongueWhen troubles rise.Behold them mounting every stump,By speech our liberty to guard.Observe their courage–see them jump,And come down hard!‘Walk up, walk up!’ each cries aloud,‘And learn from me what you must doTo turn aside the thunder cloud,The earthquake too.‘Beware the wiles of yonder quackWho stuffs the ears of all that…

‘Whose shall be first?’ inquires the ready scribe‘Who are the chiefs of the marauding tribe?’Lo! high Parnassus, lifting from the plain,Upon his hoary peak, a noble fane!Within that temple all the names are scrolledOf village bards upon a slab of gold;To that bad eminence, my friend, aspire,And copy thou the Roll of Fame, entire.Yet not…

He handles all he touches without gloves,Excepting soap.

Then Charles A. Dana, of ‘The Sun,’Rose slowly from the deepest one.‘The dead in Christ rise first, ‘t is writ,’Quoth he-‘ick, bick, ban, doe,-I’m It!’(His headstone, footstone, counted slow,Were ‘ick’ and ‘bick,’ he ‘ban’ and ‘doe’:Of beating Nick the subtle artWas part of his immortal part.)Then straight to Heaven he took his flight,Arriving at the…

And red are cheeks of the bystandersFor her acts are light and free.In a seven-ounce costumeThe widow of Thomas Blythe,Y-perched high on the window ledge,The difficult can-can tryeth.Ten constables they essayTo bate the dame’s halloing.With the widow of Thomas BlytheTheir hands are overflowing,And they cry: ‘Call the National GuardTo quell this parlous muss-For all of…